You’re Not Failing Fitness — Fitness Has Been Failing You

 

If you’ve been stuck in the cycle of trying to get motivated, falling off, feeling guilty, and starting again Monday, you’re not alone. And you’re not broken.

 

The truth is: fitness culture, as it currently exists, was never built for your freedom. It was built to keep you chasing an aesthetic ideal, performing discipline, and shrinking yourself to be acceptable.

 

And that pressure? It’s not just exhausting — it’s strategic. It’s designed to keep you fixated on your body, instead of your brilliance. It keeps women and non-binary folks small, distracted, and constantly chasing a version of health that isn’t even rooted in truth.

 

But movement was never meant to be punishment. It was meant to be power. A celebration of what your body can do, not a penance for what it looks like.

 

As Aubrey Gordon writes:

“The problem was never my body. The problem was how the world treated it.”
— What We Don’t Talk About When We Talk About Fat

 

And according to YWCA’s “Beauty At Any Cost” report, 84% of women report feeling pressure to have the “ideal” body — a body defined by cultural standards, not their actual health, needs, or joy.

 

This isn’t your failure. It’s the failure of an entire industry that profits from your insecurity.

That ends here.

---

Table of Contents

• Body Image and Exercise: Rewriting the Rules of How We Move
• Why Healing Body Image Is Foundational to Health and Movement
• Healing Through Food, Movement, and Inclusion: The Trifecta of Intuitive Coaching
  • Intuitive Health Starts With Intuitive Eating
  • Movement That Doesn’t Hurt Your Soul (Or Your Knees)
  • Queer, Trans, and Fat-Inclusive Fitness — Because You Deserve Safety AND Strength
  • This Is Coaching for Your Whole Life, Not Just Your Workout Plan
  • You’re Not Behind. You’re Just Beginning — On Your Terms
  • Ready to Rewrite Your Fitness Story? Start Here.
    • Here’s where to start:

---

Body Image and Exercise: Rewriting the Rules of How We Move

 

Movement has been sold to us as a way to change how we look — not how we feel. And that messaging? It messes with your head and your body.

 

When body image is distorted by shame, comparison, or chronic dissatisfaction, exercise stops being about connection. It becomes punishment. Obligation. A chase for approval that never comes.

 

And let’s be honest: when your motivation to move comes from a place of self-judgment, it’s only a matter of time before the burnout (or the self-loathing) catches up.

 

That’s where the deeper work begins.

 

When we address body image and exercise together — through intuitive movement, body neutrality, and size-inclusive programming — we stop chasing a finish line that was never ours to begin with. We start training for strength, for pleasure, for mobility, for resilience.

 

What I call “body image fitness” isn’t a program — it’s a paradigm shift. It’s fitness that doesn’t require self-loathing to be effective. It’s showing up with your body, not fighting against it. It’s reclaiming your space and your right to move however the hell you want.

 

In this model, we:

• Let go of aesthetic goals
• Practice noticing and honoring body signals
• Redefine what “progress” looks like (hint: it’s not inches lost)
• Reclaim movement as a celebration — not a punishment
• Center joy, rest, and nervous system safety as metrics that matter
• Build consistency through care, not coercion
• Choose presence over performance — because being in your body is enough

 

 

And a 2011 review by Bacon & Aphramor confirms: behavior-focused coaching (rather than weight loss) leads to better long-term health outcomes and improved psychological well-being.
PubMed

---

Why Healing Body Image Is Foundational to Health and Movement

 

Let’s be real: you can’t heal your relationship to movement or food if you’re constantly at war with your body.

 

Every time you hear that voice that says, “You should look different,” or “You haven’t earned rest,” it’s a red flag — not about you, but about the systems that taught you to distrust your body in the first place.

 

A body image coach doesn’t just tell you to “love yourself more.” They help you untangle decades of internalized oppression. They help you shift from self-surveillance to self-compassion. They teach you how to stop outsourcing your worth to mirrors, meal plans, or someone else’s definition of “fit.”

 

That’s where body neutrality comes in: the idea that your body doesn’t have to be beautiful or lovable to be respected. It gets to be just what it is — a complex, capable, brilliant vehicle for living.

 

When we integrate this work into your relationship with movement, everything changes. You start making choices based on how you feel, not how you look. You begin to trust that your body is on your side, not something you constantly have to fix.

 

According to researchers Tylka & Wood-Barcalow:

“Body appreciation is linked to more intuitive self-care behaviors, like movement, eating, and rest.”

— Body Appreciation Scale-2

 

And further research by Tylka & Kroon Van Diest (2013) found that higher body appreciation correlates with lower disordered eating and more consistent movement.

 

When your body becomes a partner — not a project — movement starts to feel like home.

---

Healing Through Food, Movement, and Inclusion: The Trifecta of Intuitive Coaching

Intuitive Health Starts With Intuitive Eating

 

You don’t need to track macros to nourish yourself. You don’t need to cut carbs to be healthy. And you sure as hell don’t need to earn your meals with workouts or apologize for craving bread.

 

Intuitive eating is a radical return to body trust. It’s not a trend — it’s a healing practice. It invites you to step away from diet culture and into a relationship with food that’s rooted in care, flexibility, and enoughness.

 

This isn’t about being perfect. It’s about getting curious. Can you notice when you’re hungry? Can you notice when you’re full? Can you explore satisfaction without shame? This is the foundation of intuitive health — tuning into your own cues instead of outsourcing your worth to a meal plan.

 

As Evelyn Tribole, co-author of Intuitive Eating, puts it:

“You were born with all the wisdom you need for eating.”

— Intuitive Eating

 

And the science backs it up. A 2013 study by Van Dyke & Drinkwater found that intuitive eaters tend to have:

• Better cholesterol levels
• Lower rates of disordered eating
• Higher psychological well-being
  Link to study

 

Intuitive eating is about healing your relationship with food and your body. And when paired with intuitive movement and body image work, it becomes a catalyst for deep, lasting change.

 

This isn’t giving up — it’s waking up. And it’s your invitation to stop micromanaging and start nourishing. Because health isn’t about rigidity. It’s about resilience. And you get to build it from the inside out.

---

Movement That Doesn’t Hurt Your Soul (Or Your Knees)

 

Intuitive movement means you get to move in ways that feel good, not just “effective.” It means redefining what counts as exercise and honoring your body’s capacity instead of forcing it to meet some arbitrary standard.

 

Forget what the fitness influencers say. You don’t have to sweat buckets or push to failure to get stronger. You don’t need a six-day-a-week plan to be an athlete. You don’t need to be in pain to prove you’re making progress.

 

This is about reconnecting with your body as a partner in movement. It’s about noticing what feels energizing, soothing, or powerful on any given day. It’s about including rest as a valid, essential part of your training.

 

It means 5-minute dance parties, long walks, adaptive strength training, yoga for rest, mobility flows, stretching in your pajamas, and everything in between. It means tuning in and saying, “What do I need right now?” instead of, “What should I be doing?”

 

This approach isn’t lazy. It’s liberating. It’s sustainable. And it actually leads to more consistency, more joy, and more trust in your body over time.

 

Jennifer Rollin, therapist and eating disorder specialist, reminds us:

“You don’t have to love your body to treat it with respect.”

— Jennifer Rollin

 

The truth is, you don’t need to earn movement by hating your body. You just need to listen. And that’s where real power lives.

---

Queer, Trans, and Fat-Inclusive Fitness — Because You Deserve Safety AND Strength

 

Let’s name it: mainstream fitness spaces have not historically been safe for LGBTQ+ folks — or for anyone in a marginalized or non-conforming body.

 

Between gendered locker rooms, binary programming, unsolicited commentary, and straight-up discrimination, many people have been left feeling like movement spaces weren’t made for them. Because in many cases, they weren’t.

 

So if you’ve ever walked into a gym and immediately wanted to shrink or disappear — it’s not you. It’s the environment.

 

But here’s the radical truth: you do deserve to move. You do deserve to take up space. And you do deserve support that reflects your lived experience.

 

Fat-inclusive, gender-affirming, trauma-informed coaching isn’t just a trend — it’s a lifeline for those of us who’ve been pushed out of wellness spaces for far too long.

 

Because when fitness becomes about freedom instead of conformity, everything changes.

 

As Da’Shaun Harrison writes:

“We need a body-affirming practice that centers safety, pleasure, and autonomy — not just tolerance.”

— Belly of the Beast

 

Inclusive fitness isn’t about watering things down. It’s about creating access, safety, and autonomy. It’s about redefining strength so it includes emotional safety, not just PRs. It’s about recognizing that a trauma-informed warm-up is just as important as any workout.

 

This is what coaching should look like. And it’s the bare minimum you deserve.

---

This Is Coaching for Your Whole Life, Not Just Your Workout Plan

 

You’re not just a body to train. You’re a whole person with layers, lived experiences, trauma history, cycles, identities, and real-life demands. And your movement — just like your food and rest — deserves to support the whole of who you are.

 

That’s why this isn’t about getting you to grind through a program. This is about building a life that works with your body, not against it.

 

The trifecta of intuitive movement, intuitive eating, and body image work isn’t just a feel-good philosophy — it’s a deeply strategic framework that honors your nervous system, your emotional well-being, and your long-term capacity.

 

In my coaching, we don’t just talk about what workouts to do. We talk about:

• What’s draining your energy and what’s fueling you
• How you respond to structure vs. flexibility
• What self-talk comes up when you miss a day
• How trauma might be living in your tissues
• What it means to move from compassion, not control

 

This is coaching for your real life, where some weeks you’re riding high and other weeks you’re hanging on by a thread. It’s about building routines that adapt with you — instead of ones that punish you for being human.

 

And this isn’t random. It’s grounded in science.

As Deci & Ryan state in Self-Determination Theory:

“People are most motivated when they feel autonomous, competent, and connected.”

— Self-Determination Theory

 

Research confirms that when people feel like they have a say in their own process — when they’re supported, not shamed — they stick with healthy behaviors longer and feel better doing it.

 

This is what makes my work different. I’m not just a NASM-certified trainer. I’m a certified non-diet life coach. I don’t just help you move — I help you heal.

 

And that’s what real, embodied health looks like.

---

You’re Not Behind. You’re Just Beginning — On Your Terms

 

Here’s the thing no one tells you when you’re trying to rebuild your relationship with fitness, food, and your body:

You’re not behind. You’re not too late. You don’t need to “catch up.”

You just need to begin.

 

Healing your relationship with movement and body image isn’t a quick-fix project. It’s a lifelong, evolving practice — one that unfolds at your pace, in your body, on your terms. And that’s not a detour. That is the path.

 

So maybe you’re circling back to movement after a long break. Maybe you’re brand new to intuitive eating. Maybe you’re deep in body grief. Or maybe you’ve already been doing the work and just need a reminder that rest, softness, and imperfection are part of it.

 

All of that is valid.

 

What matters is that you choose to stop abandoning yourself. What matters is that you’re willing to return — not with force, but with curiosity. Not with punishment, but with care.

 

As Lindsay & Lexie Kite remind us:

“Your body is an instrument, not an ornament.”

— More Than A Body

 

This work isn’t about checking boxes or becoming someone else. It’s about becoming more yourself.

And you are allowed to start from exactly where you are.

---

Ready to Rewrite Your Fitness Story? Start Here.

 

If you’re nodding along, heart thumping, maybe a little nervous but also deeply relieved — then yeah, this is your sign.

 

You don’t need to earn rest. You don’t need to get it perfect. You don’t need to shrink your body to get strong.

 

What you do need is a path that honors your truth — your body, your needs, your lived experience. A path that doesn’t ask you to become someone else just to feel good in your own skin.

 

This is that path. And you don’t have to walk it alone.

 

Here’s where to start:

✨ Take the Find Your BadA$$ Fitness Inspiration Quiz
Get matched with your unique intuitive movement personality so you can finally stop forcing yourself to follow someone else’s plan — and start moving in a way that actually fits you.

 

💪 Explore 1-on-1 Coaching
Whether you’re working through body grief, reconnecting to hunger cues, or just trying to get out of the all-or-nothing mindset, I’ve got your back. My coaching includes intuitive movement, intuitive eating, and body image work — all through a body-neutral, HAES-aligned lens.

 

🎯 Join the Enough Already: Fitness Mindset Reset Workshop
It’s time to let go of the guilt. The never-enough-ness. The shame spiral. This workshop will help you rewire your beliefs about movement so you can finally feel like you’re doing enough.

 

You are already worthy. You are already whole.

 

And your relationship with your body can be a place of power — not pressure.

 

You don’t need more discipline. You need more support.
You don’t need another program. You need permission.

 

And if no one’s given it to you yet? Consider this your permission slip.

Let’s go.💪